So... I sort of just sent an email to my best friend. It sounds like a love letter, which is kinda is, but I hope it doesn't sound gay. Not that I deny my potential bisexuality or anything, but I believe she's strickly straight and this really wasn't the point so it would ruin everything i tried to say.

I mean, we've been friends for 8 years and we clicked right off, so we both know we love each other. But it's tricky to plain say 'I love you' to a friend and make sure it doesn't carry any possible double meaning. Anyway. i felt like sharing. So, here's the overly long email and a picture of us during the birthday mentionned.
Just to make things clear, she's born on March 12 and turned 21 that day, my friend Pierre was born on March 19th and turned 19. I'm born on March 22nd and turned 20 on the very day. And Jean Phi, a friend of ours who is also a freaking rock star and bass teacher (I asked him once if there was any instrument he didn't know how to play, because, dude... he rocks. he just nodded and went 'Triangle. i don't know triangle.') was born on the same day as me and turned 32 that day.

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

Beginning | Previous

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

 

Beginning | Previous | End + Epilogue

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

( Chapter 13 )

 

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

( Chapter 12 )

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity. Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

( Chapter eleven )

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

( Chapter six )

 

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

( Chapter five )

 

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

 

 

 

Beginning | Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

( Chapter two )

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^




( Chapter one ) Previous | Next

Title: Heartaches
Fandom: rps
Author: adja999 
Pairing/Character: Jared, Jensen, Chris Kane, Steve Carlson, Chad Murray, other fictional characters.
Word Count: 21,437
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Fear gives way to every emotion your heart feels.
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. Hell, they do belong to themselves (and possibly each other), but oh yeah, they do own me.
A/N: This is a birthday fic for the devine define_serenity . Happy Bday, hun! Never forget you kick ass. Hope you like your present. ^__^

( Inro )

The last thing he sees is Jensen’s face, close up, probably calling out to him, yelling things in his face that he can’t make out. 

Next

 Someone should watch Firday the 13th with a stopwatch and time how long Jared Padalecki does not have his mouth open... I'm guessing it wouldn't be so much.

Did anyone else notice that?

 Guys, you'll all admit to that, and girls, we've all seen it. It's a typical hetero guy thing never to admit that they find another guy good looking. Unless they're brothers, or very very close maybe. Usually they'll deny it, shrug it off, or simply tell you that they can't judge because they're not chicks.
Come on, we girls do know when another sister's smoking, don't we?
So yeah... i'm wondering if I'm turning my boyfriend gay friendly. i've been teasing him a lot about that, to be honest, because as much as the idea of hooking up with a guy doesn't please him, he's really in touch with his feminine side. hell, when we met he spent more time on his hair than i did. (I got him to grow it out... now he gives me Jared Padalecki's picture as a model to cut it... *grins*) And he does the dishes. Which I never do.
We're like... reversed. I live like a single ampha male and he's worse than my grand mother cleaning after himself. (I swear, if there's a plate in the, he can wash it in the middle of the night in reflex because he saw it as he came back from his bathroom break.)

Now, about the contagious thing.

Today, in less than half an hour, he said two things that made my eyebrows rise. One, 'Jared Padalecki is hot'. My normal response to that would be 'no shit?' because.. well, you get my drift. But coming from a guy. A guy who's first initial isn't J... Interesting.
And like... just when we're watching Ben in Dark Angel, he says he looks all cute (o_O) and we start discussing that there's no way he's 23 because he looks so young and shit and he's like... 'I like him better in Ten Inch Hero, he really looks great with eyeliner.'

*rofl*

I'm telling you. When David's officially at least half out of the closet, and I'm his famous director best friend on the red carpet in a few years... i'm so introducing them.








Oh, and also... don't mind me. I'm tired. I have that tendency to go delirius at times in my analysis of everything that goes on around me.


See?

So hm, what's up with my best friend anyway?? 

I don't even know if we're on speaking terms anymore. *shrugs* Seriously..; last week, she came in town, we went out, and her sister got hammered. Fine, Barbara was a bit drunk herself, pissed off and probably felt wierd having to witness her sister in that state. because, yeeshh, that wasn't pretty. (Well, very funny at first... but not at the end). I waited to ride the elevator with her so she wouldn't be alone and... yeah, she needed to vent I guess. So I was there. i was the bad guy because I didn't help carrying her sister. Well, he only has two sides, you know. One guy on each, what can i do? I was behind in case she fell (she ended up taking a nose dive, but nothing serious)...
She puked on herslef, and on my boyfriend's couch, who was the gracious host that gave him the keys to his flat for them to stay.

So, yeah... I don't get an appology... whatever... she had other stuff to worry about.

Then, tonight... she comes again, I'm not feeling so much like partying, I'm tired, I say I'm coming, but just so we got out for dinner. If they go dance later, I'm out. She says it's her last week end free, then she'll be working and she won't be able to come. Fine, as if i was going to miss an opportunity to see them.
Turns out, we go to this place, called the American Way. Oh hell it is, man. It's the freaking TEXAN way, dammit. i love this place, the food is awesome but UGH i'm full for a decade and a half!
So, yeah... my stomach hurts a bit. Dude, her father is my stomach doctor, she was there when he told me about the possibility of surgery. And it's my fault if i hurt, uh? I hate too much, so I didn't feel like going to dance more. Nope.
So yeah, maybe she'd hope of getting me worked up to go out with them but the deal was clear. David's on morning shift, he gets up at 6... we aren't going our. So she's giving me the silent treatment for half an hour. Might I mention, she's still staying at David's, and he's with me, so she can have a bed allll to herslef and maybe bring a guy in there... again.
ugh.
So we left, they went out to a bar or something (like we weren't having fun dancing and them drinking in the flat. I like it better because we dance the same, we get to choose the music and it's not too fucking hot which makes me automatically sicker by the second, so yeah... not keen on the bar idea) and David and i went home. She says like 'grand pa and grand ma go home'. Bitch. Seriously. What's her deal nowadays? I'm not her freaking punching bag.
She didn't even ride the elevator with us.
Yes, yes... she's 22 too.

I guess I don't really wanna go see that movie with them tomorrow. This time I want an appology. Or at least an explanation of what the fuck happened to make her pissed at me in 20min tops.

This is what i get when i make sacrifices to my friends.

Won't do the same mistake again;