"Go to hell!" "Already there, baby."

Oh my dear gothic nights, how I'd missed you...

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 15:27:19 GMT

Okay, so... hose of you who'll read this probably only bothered because they know me. And if you do, you know I'm not much for partying.
Cause I'm a geek.
And also because of my health.
I can't believe I lasted all night.
I'm still shaky, though. Adrenaline and exhaustion, probably. I alwys seem to be riding low on sugar these days and be hungry all the time (and I EAT ALL THE F***ING TIME, DAMMIT!)...

But yeah... goth nights are really something I wante dto go back to when I came back to Paris. Why, pray tell?
1) These people are fun and the most tolerant you can find among what they call 'urban tribes'.
2) The music's good. I love industrial electro when I need to blow off steam.
3) I kind of enjoy walking down underground instead of in a club full of nosey snob people.
4) It makes hooking up really easy.

Okay, fine I have a boyfriend.

I also have eyes. :)

You'll like it if
1) You have an open mind, and are easy to amuse. Some of these people come up with the greatest costumes. (From the guy with a corset that lights up, to the post appocalyptic combo (oxygen mask and white contacts)... whee!!)
2) You're a moderate perv. Like me. Meaning: if you find yourself grinning like an idiot everytime you see same sex making out.

And... damn! Why do I always have to be taken when I go there?!

Of course, David was with me. I'm kind of surprised, actually, that I managed to drag him there. I knew he'd love it but he's usually prejudiced.

Anyway... It's pretty easy to hook up down there. In a good way. You walk down in another world. If you don't want to, you'll never be hit on, but if you look interested, you've got everyone for you. And there were these two girls, DAMN! Even Thirteen looked just about good looking compared to them.
*weeps*
I know, I shouldn't be like that, I have a boyfriend.
*huffs*
I hate myself.
Meh...

Okay. So! Now that i've scared everyone off, I'll go back to work!

PS: These pictures aren't of us, but for those who know me on FB, I might get tagged any day now.

Supernatural 5x08 Changing Channels

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 01:25:32 GMT

*gigglefit*

Srly.

They dared.

I am in awe of Kripke. (Psst, Joss. I still love you best, but I think you two should do something together.)

House, GA, CSI (Caine style, y'all), Knight Rider...

Come on, Sam the car? Hey, queenklu , you and I... we need to have a lil' chat with Kripke. They're stealing our ideas. First mine with The End (a fic i'll post soon called History) and yours with the Curse curse thing now?

Damn. What's too say here? They're good, or we are?

Anyway... the epi didn't bring much to the plot, but HELL YEAH for the bonus laughter. And... hey, aside from the very gay trailer... do you agree with me that they've been preparing us for a year an a half for Dean's coming out? (Possibly by a hot make out session with Cas, since they can't actually go Wincest.)

I mean... he's gay. Bi. whatever. He never gets that intimidated or even... affected around women. First he hits on guys when he's drunk, then there's Cas and the whole beating around the bush thing, and now... no he blushes and gapes and drools over Doctor Sexy? (Cowboy boots, uh? Reverse Doc House much? God, I wish it had been Chris Kane playing him... *Now I'm drooling*)

So.. Trickster's not a trickster, huh... It's Gabby after all. Well, I can't say I don't relate. It's sad, because i don't actually agree with what he's doing, but if I'm honest with myself, that's totally what I'm doing. Runningthe fuck away and not really caring who my get hurt in my wake. Charming. Courageous and shit.
And my family's not even that screwed up.

Okay. Plenty of rambling now. Gonna go sleep.

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 09:11:15 GMT

A little thought for Dean and Cas on this beautiful day.

Happy bithday, Bert and Ernie.

Fic: The things you’ll find at Mike’s parties

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 23:53:59 GMT

I had a pretty shitty end of day, so my sharing this with you guys is more an effort and also more vital than it was before.

Remember how I said I love my brain for all the super fanfic worthy dreams it gives me? Well, I made this one a real fic. Just because I found it so great when I woke up. Not my usual work.

Hm, so, just so we’re clear, I guess, when I dreamt I wasn’t Daneel, but I was in her place.

Title: The things you’ll find at Mike’s parties
Fandom: rps
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Chris Kane, Daneel, Genevieve, mentions of others (namely, Steve, Mike and Tom).
Word Count: 1,018
Rating: Uh… NC-17?
Summary: I really can’t tell
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: Own them? I wish.

Jared wanders away from the party and seeks the bathroom. A little too much beer will do that to your bladder. He idly wonders where his friends are. He was so deep in conversation with Genevieve and Misha that he lost track of Jen, and oh, there’s Steve. And Mike and Tom. Well, all’s not lost, right? The loft isn’t that big anyway. He will eventually bump into - or, y’know, fall asleep on - someone he knows.

He makes a turn and alters when he hears sounds of people kissing and whispering. Hm, maybe he should take another route to the bathroom. Or, maybe find a potted flower or something. Ooh! Off the balcony, like Mike does.

That’s when he hears the words, and somehow, his feet get interested and refuse to move away.

A guy is humming low. “I really… really dig that.” He purrs.

There’s a soft chuckle. “I’ll show you what else I can do with that tongue stud.”

“Oh, but I already-…”

“I said… else.” The girl insists on the word and Jared’s eyebrows shoot up. Oh.

Apparently, the guy has the same reaction. “Oh…” and then he laughs.

And then she laughs.

And then Jared’s heart stops.

It can’t be.

She wouldn’t… He wouldn’t!

They…

No way!

He rounds the corner and there they are… Chris and Daneel, leaning close and fucking groping each other, Chris’ weight pressing her into the wall.

Jared feels sick.

They stop kissing upon seeing him and Daneel gasps. But they only look surprised, not a bit guilty. Like maybe there’s an alternate universe in which what they’re doing is not way wrong.

Jensen is here, dammit.

“Jared…” Chris starts, but Jared takes a step forward and the set of his jaw makes Chris go silent again, steeling himself for whatever angry, righteous tirade or punch is coming.

“So I was thinking-…” Jensen’s voice carries from behind the corner before he actually appears, obviously finishing to pull up his fly. From somewhere behind him, comes the sound of a toilet flush.

He pauses upon seeing the couple, then their faces, then he looks over at Jared and his expression is one of shock.

Daneel looks between him and Jared, then at Chris. That fucker hasn’t moved.

“Huh.” Jensen lets out, and this sets the group in motion.

Chris drops his hand from Daneel’s hip and takes a step back. “I should…”

“Wait.” Jensen calls. He eyes Jared for a second then moves over to kiss Daneel briefly, his hand coming to brush the back of her neck and her naked shoulders. Then he meets Chris’s eyes and Jared can’t get what the fuck is going on. Jensen considers him for a while and looks back at Chris. “You should go.” He decides. “I’ll take a cab and meet you in a few. Jared and I… need to talk.”

Yes. Jared’s got that feeling too.

He knows Jensen likes guys. And girls.

Is this… Are Jensen and Dani actually doing the PR thing? Did Jensen feel the need to do it even for Jared’s benefit? What the-…

Chris and Daneel nod and start going, but Jensen catches Chris’ hand. “Hey.” He says softly, with a secret smile. “Same me some.”

“Huh.” Chris grins back. “Tell that to Dani. She said she’s gonna do her tongue thing.”

Jensen’s eyebrows shoot up and, even from where he stands, Jared can see the heat that flares in his eyes. He pulls Chris close and kisses him.

It couldn’t be confused with a friend’s playful kiss. It’s not deep, no tongue, but it’s firm and it lasts more than a peck. Chris lets out a low groan and it’s obvious they’ve done this before.

When Jensen pulls away he smiles at him. “You’re gonna weep.”

“Can’t wait.” Chris jokes and jogs off after Dani.

When Jensen turns around, he looks hesitant, although still wearing a small satisfied smirk. He tucks his hands in his pockets and walks up to his best friend.

“So… how long have you been fucking Chris?” Jared asks, blunt and little miffed.

“Actually…. Most of the time, Chris is fucking me.” Jensen attacks right back, tone gentle. He just knows how to handle Jared. Shock him right out of his anger.

It works. It seems to be just enough of TMI. “Wh-… what?”

“I’ve never… hidden this from you, Jay. I’m bi. I like guys too. And, well, sometimes when I’m with a girl for a long time I miss it.” He chuckles. “I mean, boy, the girl is gifted, I wasn’t kidding about weeping earlier but… yeah… I miss the…” he gestures vaguely at Jared’s torso, spreads his hands to encompass the width of his friend.

“...bulk?”

Jensen laughs. “Yeah. The bulk.”

Jared processes. He’s still a little hurt. He’ll tell Jensen so later, when he’s sure how long he’s been in the dark and that Jensen knows he really doesn’t care who he’s with as long as he’s happy. “So… Chris.”

“Yep.”

“And Dani’s okay with that?”

“Oh, hell man, it was her idea. She got us both drunk so we’d agree.” Jensen laughs, then his face falls to serious. “Girls are right when they say guys are uptight bitches, you know?”

Jared laughs. “Tell me about it.”

“Oh… but I’ll tell you about it.” Genevieve slides her arms around Jared’s waist from behind and snakes her hands low toward his belt.

Jensen grins at her. She winks back.

“So, I guess you knew, huh?” Jensen says.

Genevieve giggles and slides under Jared’s arm. “Oh, aren’t you adorable.” She smiles. “Dani and I know everything about the two of you.”

Jared makes a sound at that. Half between a sneering ‘ha’ and a whimper because she might just be right.

She looks up at him and slips her hand under his shirt, scratching his stomach slightly, making his muscles flutter. “I know what you’re thinking, baby.”

Jared swallows, and looks up at Jensen. “You know. I think she’s actually Ruby, sometimes.”

His best friend chuckles.

“Can we join?” she asks him, as if they’re talking about grabbing diner.

Jensen looks interested, meets Jared’s eyes. “You wanna?”

Jared blinks. He might be a little drunk. Maybe he’s hallucinating.

Still, the answer will always be the same.

“Hell yeah.”

XXXX

So yeah... I woke up then. Which is good, you know... because I was able to go to work without having to take a cold shower before.

Smallville 7x06 Crossfire

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 14:17:35 GMT

So, um... I thought we'd never get to see that. Like, ever.

And, seriously, I know it's not going to go that smooth because it's fucking SV, but... there is no way either one of them has amnesia after that. Nuh huh!

I don't really know what's going on at the end with Ollie and Mia. I mean, she'll be Speedy, i guess. But when and how? aha! Mystery.

I sill want Ollie to move on and move in with Chloe but... *sigh* I guess I'll have to wait.

Who's this Stuart guy? Hm... who is he gonna be? I don't think he's in the lore, so... anyone? an idea?

Oh, and Clark?

GG *wink*

Next time you catch in fire...

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 16:11:11 GMT

I like...

How the world is tupidly ironic and why it leads to geek world domination.

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 10:13:56 GMT

My boss bought a PHOTOSHOP licence online. So it means he DLed the software.

What's great and ironic about it, is that, he needed me and my skills to crack it still.

Why? Because Adob gives you the serials in a form that you can't read usually, so I had to crack a software to get the serials and install Photoshop legally.

Mean, twice the trouble, twice the time. Way more pricy.

Are they actually wondering why there are hackers in the world?

It is SO unfair!!! spn 5x04

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 14:54:09 GMT

That can't be right!

I just finished watching 5x04 and I haven't stopped bitching. This episode was made with two fanfics of mine! History, that I wrote after the end of S2 and The Hunter's Path that I've writen during S3 and S4 and dammit!!

They took my ideas.

From my brain!

Because they both aren't finished and I never posted them! Plus I was able to anticipate every thing both Dean said.

Talk about spoilery.

Well, except at the very end when Sam asked what they were gonna do I was so sure that Dean was eventually going to say something like "but first... we gotta ditch that ugly car of yours, man, haven't I taught you better?!"

I also didn't see orgy!Cas coming, but hey...

I wish Dean had stopped being so stuck up and hugged him at the end. Meh.

Anyway, I still think he's being an idiot. I wonder how long it's gonna take him to tell Sam what he saw. As usual, he makes the very mistakes he blames Sam for.

*whacks them both*

Weirdest shoes EVER.

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 12:16:01 GMT

Ever thought your shoes were weird? Or, on the contrary, too common? Check these out.

Sleep talking. Possession?

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 10:41:11 GMT

Apparently I've taken up talking in my sleep again.

Which is cool.

'Cept apparently I creeped my boyfriend out so much he couldn't sleep.

From what he just told me, I'm guessing in was in SPN mode. We just watched the end of S4 and I kept purring all night. (Although, I feel bad for Sam. He was wrong, okay, but he really was trying to do the right thing. Dean's never going to let him hear the end of it. When Sam was ready to give himself up. Like Dean did, except to save teh world, not only his brother (although he would have too). One act is selfish and the other altruistic.... just saying.. I hope Dean isn't too hard on him.)

Anyway... apprently I talked about how Sam was getting possessed every five minutes, which... wtf?

The thing is, maybe it was sleep, but my voice was raspy and very low according to David (I've got to stop almost slipping and call him Dean. Seriously, he needs to change intitials), like scary low. Which I know is possible since I've played some parts were I used a very low, very authoritary voice that isn't the one I speak with usually.

But the best part is... wait for it... when (remember we watched the end of S4 last night) my voice dropped even lower and I purred out something like "finally... I'm finally back."

Wow... channeling my inner Lucifer, here. *giggles*

I like. I mean, it's weird, but it's awesome. Fun.

Is it wrong that spooking my boyfriend amuses me?

Or tease him and telling him he's bisexual even though he doesn't know it? (Come on, I tell the guy I dreamt I was making out with Jensen (WOOT!!! btw. He is one gifted man...) and he goes "Hm, that would be nice." and when I smirk he goes. "For you! Dammit.") It's going to come bite me in the ass the day he dumps me so he can try guys.
Meh... maybe I could tape that.
*whacks head* Okay, I gotta stop thinking when I start channeling Mike.

Drabblefest multi fandom oct 09

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 08:22:52 GMT

Here you go, same as last time. But now, you get to choose between characters...

1) Give me a pairing of characters :

2) Give each a occupation.

3) Let me handle the crazy. *wink wink nudge nudge*

Choice among: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Jo, Anna, Eliot Spencer, Alec Hardison, Sophie Devereaux, Sam Hanna, G Callum, Abby Ciuto, Ziva David, Tim McGee, Tony Dinozzo, Logan Cale, Alec, Max Guevara, Clark Kent, Lex Luthor, Lois Lane, Chloe Sullivan, etc... anyone I may know from my shows or movies (namely, Spn, Angel, btvs, smallville, ncis, ncis la, House MD, VM, Dark Angel...)

Picture day...

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 14:46:39 GMT

Today they came to shoot pictures of us at the HQ. We had to stand and pose with a sheet of paper mug shot style, and later on they'll put the Altazeo logo on it.

I wanted to go Dean Winchester style but they didn't let me. However, the guy that shot us got the reference. We're bigger nerds that we thought.

I'm curious of what they're going to do with them. They said it's for PR. Meh.

Oh yeah, I'm a model, you know what I mean, and I do my little trun on the catwalk... on the caltwalk...

Makeup

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 14:55:42 GMT

My boyfriend says it's cheating. I say it's like photoshop, but IRL. What do you think?

I know, I know... I'm going back to work...

HIATUS

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 12:34:44 GMT

Hey people!

I moved in yesterday, my new appartment is awesome! I don't have internet installed yet so I won't post much till I get it (maybe the end of the week? Next week? Dude, I'm gonna die if it's longer), but I'll keep writing so I can update everything after I'm jacked in again.

I'll read the updates I track *cough* at work *cough*. Like, today I skipped lunch to read englishblue 's latest entry. If you don't know that wonderful autor, stay tuned because I'm planing to launch myself into podfic.

I hope my French accent will make you smile rather then scowl. *grins*

C ya folks.

Over and out!

Hm...

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 20:49:39 GMT

Uh... okay...

I maybe should watch the end of S4 before thinking too hard about that...

Which Supernatural Angel Are You?

More on Supernatural. Created by BuddyTV

Japanese are the new egyptians

Fri, 16 Oct 2009 11:44:04 GMT

Okay, where did that come from?
Well, this.

Isn't that colossal just like what the egyptians liek to do? Or, ancient greeks or something?

Fic: Well Hell (spn, ~Dastiel)

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 21:04:15 GMT

Title: Well Hell
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: Dean, Sam, Castiel, Bobby, and a little of Jo. Mentions of Helen. Slight Dastiel.
Word Count: 3,409
Rating: PG 13 ( I said slight)
Summary: Whether Castiel wants it or not, whether he likes it, everything is a test Dean has to pass.
Spoilers: Written halfway through S4. So… no major spoilers except for… who Castiel is and the end of S3
Disclaimer: Own them? I wish.
A/N: Can I simply blame this on hearing James Blunt after seeing Dean cry?

And I see no bravery… No bravery… in your eyes anymore.
Just sadness.

Dean

Dean runs his tongue on his teeth and makes a disgusted grimace when he tastes blood. He spits it out in the dark, only caring that it doesn’t land on the pentagram they painted an hour ago. Sam’s off with the car, but he knows he won’t be alone long.

He just can’t stand it anymore. So if Lucifer rises, it’s Hell on Earth? Well, what was that, then? He remembers the feeling, and his stomach is telling him it’s the same.

It wasn’t even a demon. Plain human psycho playing with powerful forces. A human. With a soul.

He wonders when his got so cold and shattered like that.

“There is blood on your face.” Castiel says as a greeting.

Dean reaches up and winces as his hand meets his tender temple. One bloody eyebrow. One. He turns to Castiel and sees the angel’s step falter as he sees the look in his eyes. Tiredness, hopelessness.

Castiel tilts his head to the side and looks pained. As if he sympathizes.

Maybe he does, he keeps on coming. Maybe Dean isn’t just a mission.

“Tell me.” Dean demands.

The angel bows his head. “You know I can’t.”

His head hands low and he nods, flopping down on the rotting couch in the abandoned house. It surprises him when Castiel takes a seat on the arm, he surprisingly hadn’t imagined Castiel touching anything dirty. Yet again, he touched Dean.

Dragged him out.

It hit him then that Castiel must have seen Hell.

“I can’t stand it anymore.”

He pours his soul out, ending up shaking, all barriers down, and Castiel listens and watches him cry for hours.

¤¤¤

“You’re broken.” Castiel remarks one day.

Dean doesn’t take his head off his hands, where it has been for an hour. He’s been researching and now he’s staring blankly at the book in front of him, stuck on his horror at the state of his life, of life in general. “Thanks.” He bites back sarcastically.

When he gets up and walks around the desk to approach, he moves like an old man, all sore and used by life. Castiel sits on the bed and brings the lapels of his coat between his knees, as if to take as little space as possible. “You’re doing a good job.” Castiel says, and even his tone says he’s trying to be helpful.

“Yeah?” says darkly. “We winning yet?”

He picks up a file on the desk and drops it on the floor. It flops open and a couple of autopsy shot slip out. A little girl’s. Mauled. He drops another file. A guy, spine ripped out. A woman, blood frozen solid.

“Is giving up a sin?”

Sam would flip hearing the words from Dean. When all else fails, all he hangs on to is the job, if one thing keeps him going it fighting for good. Castiel seems to pick up on how bad it sounds. He’s on his feet, facing Dean and reaches out, as if to touch Dean’s necklace, but seems to think better of it and lets his hand fall. The only things changing on his face are his eyes, looking lightly guilty ever so briefly that Dean doubts he’s even seen it for real.

"What?" Dean asks. "What were you gonna do?"

"I can..." Castiel looks at his hand. "I can take it away. The pain, the doubts... Hell." he meets Dean's eyes. "One touch and I can make it disappear."

Dean’s eyes twitch, like he’s resisting the urge to squint. "And you'd give me that?" He doesn’t sound like he thinks he’s worth it.

"It's a poisoned gift, Dean. I can't make it last.” Castiel says and shoves his hands in the pockets of his coat. “It's for dying souls, you... you'll keep on living and know what you've lost."

"Oh." Dean nods and looks at the floor for a moment. “But-…” when he looks up, he’s alone again.

He drags himself up and goes to find Sammy at the library.

¤¤¤

At least Sam wasn’t here. Dean thinks, and cries out with pain quietly. He gets a good grip on the tomb stone next to him and sits back on his knees, trying to take a deep, slow breath and fill his lungs completely. He regrets it as soon as a sharp pain stabs his side and he doubles over in pain again, the agony making ironically his breathing come ragged and faster. He olds on, grips the stone until his nails dig in and it hurts and focuses on that.

“You stopped it.” Castiel remarks.

“Let’s just hope… Sammy did too.” Sam’s in another town with Bobby, trying to stop some demon from breaking yet another seal. The damn thing is, they can try as often as they want, but it takes one success.

“I’m sure he will.”

Dean looks up and his smirk is somewhat hindered by the pain on his blood and dirt smeared face. “I’m sure you know.”

Castiel smiles and comes closer. Dean is still on the floor, panting with pain and he grunts when the angel helps him up. He’s not the kind to whine, but he can’t help the pained sounds he makes, it’s a clue to how bad he is. He steals a glance at Castiel, then shakes his head and lets himself be guided back to the Impala. He leans on the side of his baby and breathes.

“Dean?” Castiel prods.

“Can you…” Dean gasps, looks embarrassed. “Can you drive?”

Castiel smirks, a smug side to it.

When they get to the motel, Dean’s sunk down in realization to what happened. The adrenaline left his body and he got to drive back through the town. Castiel watched him silently, eyes hard, when Dean let his eyes drift over the burning houses, the bodies ripped apart on the side of the road.

By the end of the ride, Dean is crying silently, close to catatonic, and he doesn’t try to hide it. He doesn’t even cry out when Castiel hauls him out and into the room. He just sobs once, his legs too weak with psychological pain this time, to carry him.

Castiel lets out a startled sound when Dean lets himself drop to the floor as soon as they’re in. Castiel has his hand on to the knob, closing the door, so he’s taken aback and unable to catch him. All he can do is crouch behind him so the hunter doesn’t fall backward and hit his head or slip to the floor. Dean’s exhaustion is mental. He’s lost hope, faith.

He’s in the presence of an Angel Of The Lord, and he’s lost hope. If Castiel still had something resembling a heart, it would be breaking. He breaks, watching Dean crumble.

He’s talking nonsense, crying and pleading, begging for something… someone. Anything. No more.

Castiel has his hand flat on Dean’s chest, pressing a little to keep him from sliding to the floor, and Dean’s hand comes up to grab his wrist. When he looks up into his eyes, it’s like Castiel is looking down a bottomless pit of despair. Even after Hell, Dean didn’t look like that.

Castiel wants to ask, but when he opens his mouth nothing comes. He closes it again and Dean whimpers under him, writhing in a pain that’s not only physical. “Please.”

That does it for Castiel, he closes his eyes and feels horribly guilty even as he feels Dean gasp in his arms. He looks amazed for a moment and then completely calm, serene, even rested. It’s not that hard to pull him to the bed after that, but Castiel has to leave his hand on Dean’s chest during the process. So they end up in pretty much the same position afterwards.

Castiel’s back is against the wall and Dean is leaning against his chest, hand still on Castiel’s wrist, but loose, just touching. He’s starring ahead, like he’s thinking. His breathing is peaceful and after a couple of minutes he sighs deeply and closes his eyes, shifting a little and getting comfortable against Castiel.

Even through the self hatred he feels at the moment, Castiel can’t help the amused twitch of his lips at that.

A few minutes past dawn, Dean stirs awake. He looks up and finds the angel still watching over him. He gives him a soft smile. “I’m ready.”

Admiring the human’s courage, Castiel takes his hand away. For a few seconds, Dean just pulls himself off Castiel and looks confused that nothing’s happening. Then his eyes widen as all the horrors he’s seen come back and hit him like a truck. He gaps, cowering just as Castiel reaches out and fists his hand into Dean’s helplessly. “I’m sorry, Dean.” He says, voice raw with guilt as Dean quakes under the force of the pain. “I had to, I’m… so sorry, Dean.”

Dean’s beautiful face is streaked with tears again and it makes Castiel closes his eyes briefly against the pain he sees there. “M’okay.” Dean gasps, lying through his teeth. “Cass…” he chokes, coughs and sobs again. “You did….” His grip is white knuckled on Castiel’s fist, but he squeezes a bit harder. “M’okay.”

It takes Sam coming back seven hours after Castiel left, for Dean to let himself be dragged to the shower. He’s done shaking but is still staring hauntingly ahead. Just like before.

It’s not until the next morning he really feels the difference.

¤¤¤

He wakes at the crack of dawn again, and he when stirs he feels rested. More than he has been in a while. He feels hopeful even though the monstrosities around have never been so present to his mind. When Sam wakes up, Dean is coming back in the room, a back of freshly cleaned clothes under an arm with a paper bag from Duncan Donuts on top and a research book in the other. When he grins at his brother, Sam looks just as shocked as dean feels, but he won’t question it.

It’s true, Castiel was right, the experience is agonizing, but the night he spent in the angel’s presence allowed him to rest fully and now his spirits are up again, his good old Dean Winchester state of mind is back and he’s ready to kick some evil ass, even though the battle might never be won, even though he might die in it. Just like before, he believes it’s worth it.

When he plops down next to Sam on the bed, he frowns and feels his side, then pulls at his t shirt, looking own at his spotless side, suddenly realizing that his ribs have healed too. “Handy.” He remarks aloud, although he’d rather have a cast next time he breaks something. Just for the record.

¤¤¤

“You son of a bitch, you aren’t even gonna show up?!” Dean yells to the high ceiling of the deserted church. “Huh!? God dammit, Castiel! You don’t get to decide when you show up, I have a fucking say in it.” He stays silent and looks around for a while. Seeing nothing is happening, he huffs. “Fine. Be like that. Two can play that game.” He says, fingering the rosary in his pocket.

He stomps out, fuming all the way to the car. “… damned angels, getting me to swear and blasphem in a church...”

When he whacks the car door closed, he winces, mentally apologizing to his baby, and ignore Sam’s questioning look. “Gotta make a stop. Need supplies he says.”

Sam has the healthy instinct to stay quiet.

¤¤¤

Dean looks darkly at the altar, anger swirling in his being. He brings the athame to his hand and cuts until the blood drips from his palm. He drops the ceremonial knife on the floor and brings his hand over the altar, reciting a new line of the incantation. He presses his palm to the stone, sees the sigil he drew glow with something definitely not natural and finishes the incantation.

“I call upon you. Arise and appear before me, now.” Dean recites, then his eyes turn icy cold and his voice is harsh when he repeats. “Now!!” the order echoes loudly against the walls and he remains unshaken. He cannot be touched or scared anymore.

It’s been almost a month he hasn’t seen or heard Castiel, but he feels it instantly when the angel appears behind him. He feels like maybe what happened made him even more acute to his presence.

He turns around and they stare at each other. Dean’s angry glare meets Castiel’s steel gaze and for a long while, they don’t move, don’t make a sound.

Eventually, Dean barks out. "You're fucking hard to get a hold of." He remarks. When Castiel still doesn’t say anything, he takes a step forward, then another, until he’s standing tall in front of the angel, chin high and showing off what good little soldier he is again. He can see, deep inside the angel’s eyes, that he’s having a reaction to that, be he can’t know what it is. “Thank you.” He says, tone steady and biting. It’s genuine, no one has ever done so much for him. He doesn’t say thank you because he’s been told that it wasn’t polite not to, he’s saying thank you because he means it. Has never done so that much before, maybe.

Castiel gave him faith again. In what he’s doing, in good versus evil. In living.

He pushes further into Castiel’s personal space and presses his lips to the angel’s. Castiel presses back, only meeting Dean halfway. When Dean angles his head a bit and parts his lips a little, he’s met with the same response, but Castiel never goes further. They don’t touch, aside from their lips, kiss only as deep as Dean has it be. When he steps back, he licks his lips and tries to keep the taste of his friend on his tongue, and meets Castiel’s gaze again, it’s like nothing never happened.

"Thank you." He says again.

They never talk about it.

¤¤¤

A couple of month later, they win the war. As a side event, Dean dies.

A slow, heroic death, just like he always kind of shamefully wished he would, even though he never really thought he deserved any heroic moment.

Castiel stands nearby, but he doesn’t get close as Sam rushes at his brother’s side. Jo is sobbing copiously and Sam is crying. Castiel gives them some sort of privacy and turns away.

“Dean…” Sam croaks, because it’s kind of the only thing going on in his mind right now.

“See?” Dean coughs and winces, reaching out to wrap his hand around Sam’s shoulder. “I said ‘I got ya’. I did.”

“Yeah, you did.” Sam musters up a smile from under his tears and tries to see the wound piercing Dean’s chest through the layers of clothing and the flow of blood. “Dean, I can’t…”

“Don’t make a deal.” Dean whispers, only for Sam to hear, and Sam swallows. Dean’s dying. Dean knows he’s dying and he doesn’t want Sam to save him.

“But Dean, I can’t-… It’s not time yet.” Sam says and Jo buries her face behind her two hands.

“It’s worth it.” Dean coughs, a fine line of blood trickles out of his mouth, at the corner of his lips. “We… won.” He gets out painfully.

Sam tries to blink the tears away to meet his brother’s gaze with love before it’s too late.

“Sammy…” the word in itself means all the things in the world. Dean could have said ‘bitch’ it would have been the same, but he can’t now. His hands is slipping from Sam’s jacket and hanging lifelessly by his side.

All of Sam’s inside clenches. It’s got a terrible sense of déjà vu, but this time he didn’t get a warning. This time… this time he’s not gonna get his brother back. Ever.

Jo’s hand touches his.

At least he’s not alone.

He stands and turns toward where the angel was standing to find the spot empty.

“Son of a bitch.” He says half heartedly.

He knows that some angels don’t have feelings, they shouldn’t, but he’s seen Castiel. He’s seen him care. Things are changing up there and he bets sorrow is allowed now.

Sam

“So, what about, uh…” Bobby tiptoes around the word. He doesn’t need to say it.

Sam looks out the window and sighs. “I haven’t seen Castiel since… that night.”

“Pity.” Bobby remarks. “Coulda been of help on this one.”

Sam shrugs and looks back at the book in his hands. “We’ll figure it out.”

Two days later, they do, and it looks like they’re going to join Dean pretty soon. They can’t find a full coven of sobeckites all by themselves. Except they’re about to, because they got tricked into thinking there were just about two or three.

“Dammit.” Sam curses and flicks his hair out of his face. It’s longer now, when he looks down it hides the scar that runs across his eyebrow and under his eye. He still wonders how he managed to save it. To duck barely in time, thanks to Jo’s warning. He’s got stumble now, too. Helen admitted recently to a little addiction to a certain ass of a MD and says it makes him look older and somewhat ‘hotter’ she said, using air quotes for her young speak.

Looks like he’s gonna die without a shave.

Well. He hasn’t been really alive for a while now.

Ever since… that night.

Just as he cocks his gun with one hand and reaches out for the blade hanging at his belt, Sam hears Bobby’s surprised curse. He’s about to turn and check for danger when a man appears in front of him. He lifts his guard but the guy just takes off and runs into the pack of Sobeck worshipers and starts hacking in with a massive looking axe.

“Uh, okay.” He says, puzzled, as about ten other man appear and do the same. “It’s raining men. Hallelujah.” He dead pans, and Bobby shakes his head at his side.

Yeah, so he’s been channeling Dean’s sense of humor nowadays, so what?

“I believe you said I could be of help.” A familiar voice sounds behind them and he turns to find Castiel. He looks… different. Maybe… brighter.

Sam tilts his head. The angel always kind of looked bored or sad, and very pale. He looks less grayish than usual.

“I did what I could.” He says, and lifts a broadsword that has Sam thinking of over compensation.

“Thanks.” Sam says, and cuts off the head of the zombie looking monk that was starting to become one of Sobeck’s people. There’s only one Lord Voldemort and even he looks ugly without a nose.

There’s about thirty angels as the cavalry and even though that makes him and Bobby the damsels in distress, he can’t really say he minds. They fight like hell –pun intended- and ‘strength is number’ has never been so true. They walk out of here with one torn over shirt and a slash on Bobby’s hand. “Could have been worse.”

They’re some sort of silent conversation going on and the angels pop out one by one, leaving Castiel and a couple of others behind to talk with the humans. They exchange a couple of words and walk off, leaving Castiel and another guy. Sam stares after them, blinks, and they’re gone.

Unbelievable. It’s humanly impossible to see an angel appear or disappear. They’re just suddenly here, as if they were a second ago. But they weren’t.

Castiel smiles a little as Bobby thanks him again, and the other angel comes to stand close to him, almost shoulder to shoulder.

He looks at Sam. “You did a good job.” He says. “Bitch.” He adds as an afterthought, and it’s agonizingly familiar.

Sam gasps. Dean smiles wistfully, with the wisdom of eternity.

The hunter’s heart jumps and he takes a step forward, but they're gone. Dean and Castiel’s vessels disappeared. Maybe if he hadn’t blinked, he could have touched his brother.

One last time.

All this time… all these tests.

Dean passed, apparently.

"Well, Hell..." Bobby has a short laugh.

Sam looks up at him for a while and then a smile spreads on his face. "Guess again."

Fic: PDA (Wincest)

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 21:46:48 GMT

Title: PDA
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: Sam, Dean. Slash? Pre slash? UST
Word Count: 800
Rating: PG 13, maybe… a lil’ more?
Summary: The fans are going to love the new twist in Supernatural’s plot. Jared does not.
Spoilers: none
Disclaimer: Own them? I wish.

Dean is drunk, so Dean doesn’t see.

Or maybe he does and he doesn’t care, Sam isn’t so sure about that. Lately Dean’s been a complete mystery to him.

He doesn’t like the feeling, but what is he going to do? Dean’s been closing in on himself and Sam knows that any attempt on his part to get to him will make things worse.

So he watches from a distance. Because Dean won’t even sit with him when they go out for beers. Granted they eat together, but it makes Sam wonder if he did something to piss his brother off.

It’s not like Dean is trying to seduce anyone. In that case, he would have gotten it. He is a male after all, despite the numerous times when Dean denies it.

Dean is watching a couple of girls play pool. Watching, not ogling. Like it’s only his eyes that stay on the game while his mind is completely elsewhere. It’s been ages since his beer has touched his lips.

When the guy asks him if he’s got a problem, Dean looks at him calmly, placidly. He doesn’t see any problem. He doesn’t even catch the threat. “Nah, just chillin.”

He doesn’t pay attention as the guy leaves with a displeased expression. He didn’t like the answer. Dean’s been distracted a lot lately. For a hunter, it’s a pretty poor performance.

So Sam is the only one who sees as the guy keeps watching Dean watching the chicks. One of them is probably his girl, or his next prey. The guy is shaped like a truck and Dean looks pretty tired. Also, he’s got pals around, talking softly and jerking their chins toward Dean, who’s still oblivious.

It’s like watching a movie and see the trap close in on the hero. And, little brother worship aside, Sam’s hero already died once and had his fair share in life. He doesn’t want Dean anymore battered or bruised.

Sam has to react fast when the guys start stomping in his big brother’s direction. He does the only thing he can think of.

To be honest he doesn’t even think he thinks at that moment. He strides up to Dean, turns him around, has a pinched smile as he says loudly ‘Sorry I’m late.’ and kisses him square on the mouth. He hears Dean’s startled noise and feels him stiffen against him but contrary to what Sam expects, he doesn’t jerk back. A beat passes and Dean melts against him, grabbing his jacket and pulling him down.

Sam doesn’t know what he’s doing, but the hair on the back of Dean’s neck is really soft. And Dean’s startled moan makes him shudder. He can’t believe he’s kissing Dean and Dean’s kissing him back. Open mouthed, tongues and –hello, hand on my butt… Isn’t it a little too much for ‘just for show’?

The kiss slows down, the hand slips from his jeans and he pulls away. He tries not to cringe in expectation of the punch that’s coming, sooner or later. Probably in about two minutes since Dean seems to have figured out what just happened. He watches the guy turn their back to him and blinks at Sam a few times.

Maybe Sam is hallucinating, but it looks like a smile is tugging at Dean’s lips. A genuine, amused smile. Dean’s eyes sparkle with something like glee. He chuckles. “You are so nuts, little brother.”

That’s when it hits him. He just kissed his brother. A full on, two minutes kiss. And god dammit, it was nice.

His hand slips from Dean’s collar and goes to rub the back of his own neck. “Yeah, uh… sorry, didn’t think of anything else.”

“S’alright.” Dean must be drunk from his half bottle of beer because he’s chuckling to himself again. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Yeah.” Sam falls in step next to him. “Sorry I ruined any potential hook ups for you.”

That makes Dean cringe. “Whatever.” He sighs. “Didn’t even wanna get drunk anyway.”

Dean hasn’t wanted much of anything lately either. It makes Sam worry that maybe he’s not worrying enough. Maybe Dean’s sick or something.

“So,” Sam says, shoving his hands down his pockets, glancing at his brother. “Wanna go grab a beer?” He frowns at his own stupidity. “Somewhere else?”

Dean looks up at him, for a brief moment he squints slightly, then he throws something at Sam. “You drive.”

On the way to another bar, Sam, still wondering why he got to be at the wheel, has a thought. When they were kids, their dad taught them fight or flight scenarios, and how to diffuse bad situations. Like tonight. Prompt Danger Avoidance. He snorts inwardly, thinking that his dad would be proud he remembered PDA when it was needed.

Dean Winchester is one fucked up brother... (J2)

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 21:17:39 GMT

Title: Dean Winchester is one fucked up brother, while Sammy’s utterly screwed and Kripke’s a sadistic bastard on crack.
Fandom: rps
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, mentions of Kripke and one FC: Xavier.
Word Count: 2,218
Rating: PG 13, maybe… a lil’ more?
Summary: The fans are going to love the new twist in Supernatural’s plot. Jared does not.
Spoilers: none
Disclaimer: Own them? I wish.

“Sam does what?!!”

Jared almost drops the phone and struggles to take his breath. It’s so unfair that the photography director gets the script before he does, but since he’s warning him, he’ll complain later. When he manages to put the receiver back against his hear he hears the end of Greg’s sentence. “…and then Sam just kisses Dean.”

“What-…” the hell? “Why?” Krikpe’s pulled weird shit over the years (the kind of shit that have fans send Jensen red suspenders, for example), and has always managed to convince his actors that, yes this is great. But this? This takes the proverbial biscuit.

Greg knows Jared’s gay, so he probably thought he should warn him. They talked about how uncomfortable sex scenes can be, and… even though a kiss isn’t a sex scene, it can come pretty close to it. Especially in Supernatural.

“Actually, it’s not Sammy. It’s a thing that looks like him.” Greg corrects. Great, it still means Jared. “It’ supposed to show that… Oh, yeah… because Dean goes for it, like… totally, it’s supposed to show that, even though Dean doesn’t exactly want it, he’d do anything for Sammy. I think it’s supposed to show his devotion or something.”

“Huh.” Jared snorts. “Yeah, I’m sure the fans will get that. They won’t get stuck at the huge wincest squee part, that’s for sure.”

Greg chuckles. “So, yeah… I thought I’d tell you.”

“Yeah… Thanks man.”

They hang up and Jared turns off the boiling water. No need for pasta, he’s not that hungry anymore.

So… the thing is, Greg’s his friend and he knows he’s gay. Jensen knows, or Jared thinks he does, he might believe Jared’s bi. When they met he was, or thought he was.

But really none of them know how bad Jared’s got it for Jensen. He’s not gay, he’s not bi. He’s just hopelessly single and completely unavailable.

There’s only one thing on his mind, it doesn’t have a gender per se. It has a presence, a feel, and bright green eyes that laugh along when Jensen smiles.

He’s so completely screwed.

And he’s going to have to kiss the man he loves and pretend that… he’s just pretending.

“Just great.” He huffs in frustration.

“What’s not so great?” Jensen comes from the living room an excited bounce in his step, toy in hand and Sadie in tow, catching the sarcasm in Jared’s voice.

“Nothing…” Jared says and knows it would be a losing battle so he corrects himself. “…you won’t read tomorrow.”

“Oh, got spoilers for the next episode?” The excitement in Jensen’s voice is clearly not from playing with the dogs anymore. He loves his job. At the moment, Jared wishes he could say the same thing.

“Yes.” Jared drags it out. He feels too overwhelmed to freak out now. “You and I. We kiss.”

Jen just stares at him in confusion, obviously trying to decide if this is a joke, but Jared’s never been good at dead panning. “Okay, I’ll bite. Why?” Jensen frowns. “I mean… hello? PG 13?” He holds up a hand. “Wincest.” He holds up another, balancing them like scales. “Is Kripke on crack?”

“Well, I guess we’ve got to play the wincest angle. And the Jsquared angle as well. It’ll make the ratings go through the roof.”

“I’ll bet.” Jensen is smirking. “Still. I don’t get it.”

Jared feels cocky and wants a hasty retreat before he loses his nerve. He pats Jensen’s cheek. “It’s to show how much you’re devoted to me, man.” And on that note he leaves.

¤¤¤

Still, the fact remains. No wonder it’s the kind of scene they get at the last moment. Kripke wants no leaks, but he also doesn’t want his actors to set up booty traps around his trailer.

Tuesday, tomorrow, he’s going to kiss Jensen. Sam and Dean are going to kiss, or Fake!Sam and Dean, and that scene is going to last hours in shooting.

Kripke’s explained it to Jensen and him and it seems somewhat okay with the Supernatural verse. It’s really about Dean caving in to whatever Sam would want so he can forget himself in Sam, in living for Sam. Just like he always have. To protect him, to feed him, to raise him, to hunt with him. Dean’s purpose has always been Sam.

Sometimes, Jared wishes he was Sam.

¤¤¤

When they actually shoot the scene, Jared feels awkward as hell, his hands are sweaty and he’s pretty sure they’re trembling. The crew is cool about it, and everyone seems sympathetic to how weird this must feel to them. Especially Eric, who calls a break, tells them to take a walk, clear the tension and get back in five.

Jensen seems tense too, but he’s the first one to talk, always the big brother, in life too. “Look, just… don’t overthink it, Jay. Just do it.” He says as they’re heading back.

“Alright.” Jared says and throws his empty coffee cup in the trashcan. “Just remember you told me that.”

As they take position again, Emma doing some more work on Dean’s bloody temple –the kiss is supposed to be Fake!Sam panicking over Dean and thinking he’s been knocked out- Kripke stands next to Jared and presses his shoulder gently. “You go, son. I know this is weird.”

“You have no idea.” Jared says and goes to kiss Jensen again. No. Not Jensen. Dean.

Oh, what the hell, after all? He wants the kiss to look real, and as desperate as Sam kissing Dean thinking he almost lost him? Fine, Jared’s going to kiss Jensen.

They don’t have enough cameras so there’ll be two shoots. One the kiss, then when they break it off.

On cue, Jared puts on his ‘Sam’ mask and grabs Jensen off the floor. Jensen whimpers, again, and it’s really no help at all. “Dean? God, I thought…” Jensen’s eyes flutter open and Jared kisses him.

He really does, and to say Dean goes for it would be the fucking understatement of the century. Like it’s been scripted, Jensen looks shocked at first, and hesitant, but when he gives in, he’s all Dean. Desperate, fucked up and needy. He gives himself up to Sam.

Kripke is right. This fits in the scenario. Dean died for Sam. Went to hell for him. He’d give him his body without a second of hesitation.

The extend of the idea makes Jared tremble.

Jared’s shaking, he’s aware of it. His hands on Jensen’s side, still holding him up from the floor and behind his co star’s head are far from steady. Jensen’s are, though. Balled in his jacket and slipped in his hair.

“And cut! Awesome, boys.” Jared jerks away from Jensen’s lips, unable to go much further without dropping Jensen.

Like he’s expected it, he’s so busted. Realization is clear in Jensen’s eyes and Jared curses inwardly. He knew all along that someday he’d be figured out, but he didn’t really want Jensen’s epiphany to happen on set. After a fucking kiss between Sam and Dean.

Green eyes are searching his, watching his face as if Jensen is seeing him for the first time and this is the most painful thing in the world. Jared’s not the same for Jen now. He’s changed.

Except it’s not true. He cringes, tries for a small smile as he regretfully lets go of Jensen and they scramble off the floor. “Just remember you told me that.” Re reminds Jensen, now the warning is clear. Too bad it wasn’t when it counted.

“Great job, guys.” Eric says, oblivious, rewatching the scene on some monitor. “We’ll break now, we’ll shoot the rest after lunch.”

The rest means when Sam – the real Sam – walks in on the kiss. Then there’s another shot to be made with Dean and Fake!Sam breaking the kiss.

Jared realizes with a bitter sinking feeling that things are going to be just as awkward between Dean and Sam than between him and Jensen now. To the same level. They all live together.

“Just great.”

They shoot both scenes. Jared doesn’t know what special effect they’ll use to make Sam walk in on the kiss, since he can’t be twice on screen at once for real, and he’d usually ask but he’s feeling way too off to be able to watch as Xavier, the photoshop expert shows him.

The entire day is awkward. Not enough for anyone to remark on it, but the few glances he exchanges with Jensen tell him enough. Jensen’s worried, and pained that things are that way, and as soon as he meets Jared’s eyes the expression shifts to a pleading, questioning look. Jared quickly looks away, each time.

He’s kissed Jensen. He’s utterly screwed now. He’s not even turned on, hard or anything by the memory of it.

He just feels hollow, tight black hole in the middle of his chest pulling in insides into nothingness and leaving him aching. Now he knows what he can’t have. Dean just kissed Sam –in his mind, at least- and it was the most mind blowing kiss of Jared’s entire life. Maybe because it’s the first time he was actually already drop dead in love when the first kiss happened, or maybe because it’s just Jensen.

He catches himself praying for Dean and Sam never to hook up, even though he’d always thought it’d be funny, like… for the last scene of the very last episode they’d wake up in a bed together and yelp at the sight of each other or something. The fans would love him if they knew he thought that.

And he watches to smack himself because right now? He’s hoping Supernatural gets cancelled.

He doesn’t know what the day holds for Jensen, and he doesn’t ask, clear sign of how off he is, but when they get back at their place, Jensen corners him in the kitchen, leaning against the center island and looking at him seriously.

“Did I dream it, Jay?”

“What?”

“The look in your eyes.” Jared turns, chewing his lip, Jensen meets his eyes. “You’re a really good actor, but… I’ve seen Sam want and I’ve seen you want and they’re two different things. Earlier today…” A beat. “…there was both.” He hesitates. “Wasn’t there?”

“Like I said…” Jared walks away, turning his back. “Just remember you told me not to overthink it. To just do it.”

He leaves the kitchen for his room. Wonders how long things will be awkward, if Jensen is going to try and have the ‘you know you’re my best friend’ talk with him and if he’s going to have to watch the man his loves look for a new apartment.

“You know…” Jensen’s voice from his door makes him jump. Jensen’s leaning against the doorframe. “… I’m kind of glad you did.” He gives Jared a soft smile. “I feel like I know you better. I can see you better.”

“Great.” Jared’s voice drips with sarcasm.

“And I can do this.”

Jared looks up, curiosity’s always been a week spot. And he can’t help but furrow his eyebrows when Jensen doesn’t move, except to reach out for his own wrist and just pop open a large leather band he’s been wearing as a bracelet for a while. Okay, what does it have to do with…?

“Drunken tattoo.” Jensen explains, and he flops on Jared’s bed, one leg folded under himself, the other foot on the floor, mirroring Jared’s posture. Jared is sure it’s completely unintentional. They’re sort of close. He holds out his wrist for Jared to examine.

He has to turn it over to really see and the touch makes his heart flutter. There’s a ‘J’ on the inside of Jensen’s wrist. Lettering like. It’s really discreet, albeit it’s not small, maybe two inches, but it’s in white ink. It’s there all the same. Jared tries to recall how long it’s been since Jensen has started wearing the bracelet, because it’s healed.

“It took me sometime to admit to myself that I had more insight drunk than sober, at least on matters concerning my own psyche.” Jensen says, and Jared grins at his choice of words, and then he stops breathing because Jensen’s taking his hand softly. “I don’t think I branded myself with my initial.”

“Oh.”

Oh.

Jared resists the urge to whoop, and looks into Jensen’s eyes to make sure, really sure he’s understood everything right.

“But… You’re not gay.” It’s stupid, it comes out of his mouth before he can help it.

Jensen chuckles. “I think…” His fingers are tracing Jared’s hands. “… that gender doesn’t really matter, when it comes to that kind of love.”

Jared gasps. Love? “What-.. What kind?”

Jensen scoots impossibly closer and ghosts over his lips, appreciating Jared’s sudden lack of breathing. “The Jsquared kind.” Jensen says, before brushing their lips together, soft, pink skin catching a little at the contact. “I think we’re really going to make the ratings go through the roof.”

Jared fakes an exasperated groan, he doesn’t know how he does it though. “Ugh, I can already see the fanmail…”

He chuckles and kisses Jensen.

It’s nothing like Dean and Sam’s kiss, it still tastes like Jensen, but it’s not Dean kissing back. Jared is going to hug Kripke first thing tomorrow.

The Hustler’s way (Drabble, Dean/Sam)

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 20:43:42 GMT

Title: The Hustler’s way
Fandom: Supernatrual
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: Wincest
Word Count: 508
Rating: PG 13, maybe… a lil’ more?
Summary: Hustling might just be the solution to everything.
Spoilers: none
Disclaimer: Own them? I wish.

Dean is pissed at him for something, he assumes it’s because of the job they’re working on, so when he offers to play pool, after he’s downed two beers in such a complete silence that Sam seriously considered hanging himself to the lamp above their table, he’s genuinely surprised.

“Okay.” He’s a little unsettled by the change in Dean’s attitude, but he figures maybe Dean worked out what was bothering him by himself. He follows him to the table and watches as he shrugs off his leather and hangs it, rolling up his sleeves. Oh, so it’s like they’re hustling. Not for fun, then. They’re going to play their best. "What are the stakes?"

Dean doesn’t spare him a glance and racks the balls. "I win, the charade's over."

“Dude!” Sam huffs. “How many time do I have to tell you? I wasn’t lying to you when I said-…”

Dean’s look makes him trail off. “That’s not what I meant.”

He says it matter of factly, holds his gaze for longer than necessary, Sam’s mouth is dry.

Oh, that. Dean is actually acknowledging that?

Sam doesn’t know how to call it, because everything sounds wrong and nothing fits. They’ve been beating around the bush for months and for two days it’s been really awkward between them. But it’s really no Sam’s fault that he crashed on top of Dean like that. He didn’t ask to be pushed off the roof. Or to land, hard, on his brother’s strong body, panting inches away from his mouth.

Dean’s ranger boots trip over the threshold, but he doesn’t mess up the slat line. Sam’s fist holds him up as he kicks the door shut, then Dean’s pushing him back against it, mouth hungry on his. They move blindly around the room, forgetting to turn the light on, and Sam twists his foot on something. The carpet, it seems. Dean catches his waist and laughs warmly as one of their flailing limbs sends something undefined clattering on the floor. “Shut up, jerk.” Sam growls and he pushes the coat off Dean’s shoulders. Not that he doesn’t love it, its smell is even erotic to him, but he wants Dean in way less than that.

In response, Dean pulls Sam’s shirt over his head, hands roaming over his chest. Sam turns them around and walks backwards toward the bed. “Sam…” Dean has trouble getting it out with Sam pulling his shirt over his head, a button catching on his eyebrow briefly. “You don’t have to…” he croaks. “It was just a game.”

Wordlessly, Sam pushes Dean down on the bed and licks at Dean’s nipple.

“We don’t have to do thi-…ahh!” Dean arches as Sam nips.

Sam is working at Dean’s belt now.

“Sam…”

Dean’s calls are getting weaker and more anxious. He’s edging on panicked.

“Sammy…”

“Dean.” Sam’s voice is harsh, it sounds like a ‘shut up’.

“What?” Dean’s throat works as he makes out Sam’s eyes in the dark.

“I threw the game.”

And with that, Dean’s pants are gone.

The easiest way to a man’s heart is through his balls. (M2)

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 20:29:04 GMT

Title: The easiest way to a man’s heart is through his balls.
Fandom: rps
Author: Adja999
Pairing/Character: M2 (Misha Collins, Mike Rosenbaum)
Word Count:
Rating: *cough* NC-17 I guess. Again.
Summary: See title.
Warnings: Almost PWP, but… actually….
Disclaimer: Own them? I wish.
And I totally blame this on queenklu for having my brain addicted to yet another something.

“It’s only a weekend.” Misha whines, looking expectantly at Mike, and… seriously, Mish didn’t need to add that PadaleckiPuppy look to those dark lashes and gorgeous baby blues. What is that, a triple whammy?

Mike tries his best to focus on Misha, he really does, but the brunette’s hand is working him really good and there’s no way he can think straight -or any other way for that matter- right now. “Seriously?” He grits out. “You wanna… talk ‘bout this….” He pauses to moan loudly at the flicker of Misha’s thumb. “…now?!”

“Hm hm…” Misha says, taunting, leaning close to his cock but not quite nearing it with that smirking mouth of his.

"God, please..." Mike pants. "What-... why?"

He’s incoherent. So what? Have you ever had Misha Collins about to go down on you just after you woke up from a nap? No? Yeah, so you can’t mock.

"It's Meg's wedding." Misha points out. "Jen and Jare are going. It'll be fun. Plus, Meg's kind of hot and she'll be wearing a dress."

"Gnuh..." Mike groans. "Okay, okay, fine...” he rushes out, desperate. “Just... just do something!"

"And you'll come?" Misha grins. Pun intended.

Damn right, I will. And when he nods, Misha takes him whole, and he does.

Mike has always been proud to be a manipulative son of a bitch, but he found his match with Misha. He really is the definition of sneaky.

And he's right, once again.

The way to a man's heart is through his balls.

rofl

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 19:55:35 GMT

I don't even know who that guy is, but I owe him four minutes of happiness and maybe some tears of laughter. So, hm... especially if yo'ure down or something, if you wanna laugh... give it a click... it really puts things in perspective.

Everything's amazing & nobody's happy !

Universe, quit it... I am not actually a guy.

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 15:29:47 GMT

Why do I have gay porn stuck in my head?

I mean... not that I mind, honestly... but mayeb I talk in my sleep sometimes, you know... or something, and it makes me weird to think about it because some might think it makes me a freak.

I might think that.

But, hey... last night... I dreamt of Alex and Zach making out... *thinks* Maybe it was Vampire Eric and Sylar, I don't know exactly... But my point is... okay, that was hot...

But still!! I'm not a guy having a gay crisis! *ducks an eyebrow at Jensen* Right?

And yeah... okay, on the gay/bi territory I'm pretty much settled because *AWWWW WINNN!!!* the dream ended with me sandwitched between Jensen A (as in Ackles if you're a noob, or just Fuckin' A otherwise) and Lauren Cohan. *drools*
It seems that the lack of living with my bf has my brain in compensation overdrive. Awesome!

Speaking of... I'm moving in monday!

I love my mind... seriously!

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 07:55:36 GMT

There's this recuring dream I keep having, right? Sometimes I'm part of SPN's cast, sometimes it's Leverage, lately I've also been in Dollhouse... Awesome right? I get to be friends with everyone and I date whoever I want depending on the dream.

Last night... Huh... let me remember. Ah, yeah... two parts.

I was taking the subway to work (wtf?) with Alexander Skarsgård (hot as ever...) and we were greeted upon arrival by none other than Zach Quinto AND Chris Pine. And I was like rolling my eyes and sighing when all Zach found to say hello was to french Alex. So, Chris took my mind off it. God! Those eyes!

The otehr one took place at next year's NO H8 event. I was proudly sporting my bipride bracelet, and it got a lot of attention, given Kristen Bell wore one too and we were all goofing around.

And in honor of pride and no discrimination, Jensen and Jared kissed. So, it started soft, right? I like two buddies just kissing for show. But then Jared cupped Jensen's cheek and stepped closer and.... wow...

And there was a picture snapped apparently, with Chris (Kane) laughing his ass off in the background and me a little to the side, fist up in the air and screaming something in the lines of "whoooohoo!"

And that picture of them of course was all over the internet by the next day, and I found icons of me too, with the caption 'Fangirl' or 'squee' ... which... hell yeah.

And when they broek appart Jensen laughed and went "Whoa."

People! I got a visual!

grumble grumble

Tue, 06 Oct 2009 22:53:53 GMT

STEVE CARLSON AND FRIENDS

Friday, October 9th at 11pm

HOTEL CAFE

1623 Cahuenga Ave

Hollywood, California 90028

*Disolves in tears* I got invited!!!
*head desk*
And yeah... living in Paris...